Friends

I've been thinking a lot about my first post of the day. The unsent letter. It got a lot off of my chest and I really wish I could send it. By sending it things won't get any better so I feel what is the point. With that post much thought went into my friendships. Old and new and all of those in between.

We have all received those chain letters about friends. How they come and go and when they have served their purpose that person moves on. There are so many versions of that letter and my summary comes close to the meaning. Over the years I have heard so many points in reference to those chain letters pertaining to friends. Those friends that stick around with you through thick and thin are real friends. But what happens when there is a bump in the road and that train gets knocked off track? Is it their time to go? Is it true if you love something and you let it go that if it is meant to be that it will return to you?

Over the years I have had so many people in my life. Many people come and go but not out of fault of mine or their own. It's all part of the business. The auction business. You get close to someone and they move or pass away. So they have served their purpose. I may have learned a thing or two with that experience. I've had people who I was close to and I do or say something that I felt was right and it back fires and they go their separate way. Again they served their purpose in my life and I may have learned a lession from that. Those lessions may not be revealed right away but maybe later on in life.

Love is a powerful thing when it comes to friendships. When in college I joined a sorority and with that gained a group of sisters. They were my family away from home. Our lives are polished with each of our own life experiences but we share that common bond. Sisterhood! We will always love each other because we are sisters. We may not be close friends any more but we always keep tabs on one another because we genuinely care.

During the past six months I have gained some friends back that I have lost. It is such a wonderful feeling such as letting something you love go and see if it returns to you. Both of these girls were my best friends my freshman year of college. We were a trio! Always together. Events took us separate ways and one relationship moved on while the other remained.

One of the girls moved back home and out of sight for several years until I did a search for her online. Very frustrated, I continued my search and made several phone calls. My last number on my list turned up to be a relative of this woman. Two weeks later I got a call from my old friend. I was so overwhelmed with joy over hearing that familiar voice on the other end of my phone. Now that woman has stepped back into everyone's world again to rekindle those lost relationships.

My relationship with the other girl went sour my sophmore year. A lession I thought I learned in high school that apparently didn't work. I did something that I felt was right at that time and it ruined everything. No explanation would help. Just like the previous girl I never gave up. I found her on myspace and wrote a kind message to her. Nothing popped up for a long time and then I had a message in my mail box. We talked a few times back and forth over the computer and then on the phone. The next step was a meeting at a park that was half way from our homes. It was such a great meet up! So wonderful to be able to see that familiar face again, receive a warm hug, and to talk. I guess it shows if you want something bad enough and really fight for it that the reward will be there in the end.

I have had several friends over the years that when we went our separate ways the relationship went on to be one of an aquaintance. We still have a mutual respect for one another, well some of them. Those other ones I am ok with how things are but once in a while I try to initiate contact. Maybe it shows that I have a hard time leaving things go.

My current friends I am very thankful for. These are a group of women that we all share a common bond. Our children! The one woman I knew in high school and we have formed a close friendship as moms. Another mom calls me at least once a week if we don't see each other at a playdate for our children. It is so nice! We ask each other our kids and chat a bit.

Lastly, I am going to talk about another of my current friends. This woman has such a caring heart. We speak at least once a day, maybe more. If we don't talk for a few days one of us is calling the other to see how things are going. We check up on each other's kids when they are sick. I am very honored to have this woman as a friend and I know you know who you are. It is just nice to talk to someone who understands and if they don't just lend an ear. Thank you so much for your friendship!

The other day I spoke to one of the ladies mentioned above and I was talking in reference to the woman I wrote the earlier entry about. She told me that that girl doesn't seem like much of a friend. When looking back on that she is right. Like a lot of my friendships in the past I put a lot of effort into them. Tend to do a lot or even all of the work to maintain that relationship. The 'friend' from the entry has never called me just to chat or to ask about my children. I have always called her. Has never done something 'just because' for me. I'm always the one to initiate contact. Just like those individuals I have lost in the past who want to remain that way. Maybe this is my wake up call to just leave her go for good. If the love of friendship/sister was ever there in the first place she will come back. It may not be right away but maybe a few years down the road. It is very hard though since she is dating someone in my husbands close family. Well actually right through the woods from my property. When we go to my mother-in-laws or to the farm property on foot we go right past the home where she is at. Josh always tells me that 'patience is a vertue'. Half listening, I agree with him. I do need to be more patient. I know I do! Just something I am going to work very hard on.

With that, through all of the relationships I have had from my past through the present I believe that each and every one of them has served their purpose. They have molded me into a better person.